you say things that hurt so bad. but what you dont know is that the words you dont say, hurt even more. because its there. so evidently there. the problem is still there as well. i look into you eyes, you want more. and all i want is for you to be here. and all you want is for me to follow you to wherever you are. you're the one person i keep hidden becuase there are just too many bad memories where you are involved. but i still love you. and now you want me to sacrifice everything to be with you? i cannot do that. you're getting selfish. we agreed on this. take it or leave it.

moodkiller.

i just want to snuggle up with someone. hoping that tomorrow will be a perfect day. but it wont be becuause period is about to arrive. i can feel it. haha. breakouts and fatigue and URGH. period cramps are the most hated part.

i dont understand how my mood changed like that.

i gave in to you. because i wanted to. i compormised. because like what i told him, i dont want to let this opportunity to pass by me and i havent even had a chance to glimpse at it. i dont take you money nor your gifts. because i want you to know that this love isnt materialistic. and i'm independent. thats the way my mother brought me up. i dont deserve gifts if i didnt earn them. and i dont want it. i'm not going to give up everything for you just becuase you're taking fucking advantage.

why can't things go back to the way they were?